All that waits to be known…

Posted on July 16, 2010 by Nate

Midlake – Core of Nature

I have so deeply, deeply been resonating with this band from Texas, Midlake. It is one of the very few bands that I have found that is so deeply rooted in a connection with the earth, the land, history, and the realm of spirit. This may not really be their intent, but it speaks me on that level.

This song, The Core of Nature includes the following:

I will wear the sun,
Ancient light through these woods,
Woods that I walk through alone
I will take my rest
With all creatures who dwell,
Under the smallest of green
I’ll remain no more than is required of me
Until the spirit is gone
I will long to see all that waits to be known
And all that will never be known

Enter the core of nature,
No earthly mind can enter,
But I will wear the sun,
Bound to others,
We see many things

I will train my feet to go on with the joy
A joy I have yet to reach
I will let the sounds of these woods I have known
Sink into blood and to bone
I’ll remain no more than is required of me
Until the spirit is gone
I will long to see all that waits to be known
And all that will never be known

It’s this repeated phrase of “longing to see all that waits to be known and all that will never be known” that is echoing in my heart and soul.

Have you felt that? the warmth of the sun, enveloping you in a way as though you were wearing it? Have the sounds of the earth ever sunk into your blood and bones?

There is indeed a great deal that is yet to be known and a great deal that will never be known. There is a knowing that happens that in non-mental, non-linear… a knowing that happens in unity with the world and with the Spirit of God that is “in all and through all and in whom all have their being.” It takes much more time than many are willing to give. It takes much more silence and alone-ness than many are willing to commit to. It takes much more letting go than many are willing to un-grasp…

How about you? Are you willing…

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Confession: I want more control

Posted on July 14, 2010 by Nate

I’ve been going through some pretty significant melancholy feelings lately… some ups, some downs… but consistently reflective on my current situation and the state of my heart in the midst of it. The other night, Kat tried to get me to talk about it. “Come and talk to me about it on the front porch. Share some watermelon with me…”

I don’t really talk about my melancholy feelings to her (or anyone, for that matter) too often, so she probably didn’t realize that I don’t really like to say much when I my focus is so internal in these times. I told her I didn’t really want to talk about it that much… but I went out there anyway.

The even was beautiful and after listening to the breeze for a while I said, “You know… I guess I just wish I had more control of things. Work, relationships, income…”

As on top of it as she is, she responded with, “Well, you know you can’t control things.”

And this is the root of my melancholy. I wish I was more in control, but my heart and mind tells me that I am not. The battle that ensues is a result of this tension of acceptance.

As I reflected on this… and listened, felt, and breathed into the breeze… I realized the silliness of my situation.

So I told Kat I also wished she would pay attention to the things I wanted her to pay attention to and not pay attention to the things I didn’t want her to. She asked what I would like her to pay attention to and so I told her. Then she asked what I don’t want her to pay attention to. “I can’t tell you that! Then you would pay attention to it.”

This put it all in a clear light for me. I realized how grateful I really am… for God and the provision, the surprises, the community, the joys of following my soul’s calling… even in the midst of no control.

So is gratitude the counter-balance to a need for control? I wonder…

And now I have a word for you who brashly announce, “Today—at the latest, tomorrow—we’re off to such and such a city for the year. We’re going to start a business and make a lot of money.” You don’t know the first thing about tomorrow. You’re nothing but a wisp of fog, catching a brief bit of sun before disappearing. Instead, make it a habit to say, “If the Master wills it and we’re still alive, we’ll do this or that.”

~ James

Posted in Questions, personal stuff, spiritual formation | 2 Comments

We don’t need wealth for wisdom

Posted on July 12, 2010 by Nate

Kat and I were watching Batman Begins the other night and I marveled at how easy it was for Bruce Wayne to just disappear or to go off and study with a guru… to take his vision quest or time of wandering in the Cocoon. I also remember my issues of Outside Magazine and all the article of the wealthy millionaires and their excursions, travels, and adventures… and all the money they gave to Earth restoration projects.

I was hit with a strong realization.

Sometimes, people with a lot of money can afford (if they so choose) extravagant vision quests, life transforming journeys, or sitting with the world’s greatest teachers. Many of these “away from home” transformations do cost quite a bit of financial investment to partake in.

The rest of us, though, who don’t have the financial means, shouldn’t be discouraged. It is up to us to find our transformation in the midst of everyday life. We can be just as wise, just as aware, and have just as broad of life experience. After all, sometimes those who have seen the world over, have a great difficulty truly seeing what is right in front of them.

Spirit is not only accessible through wealth.

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How to change the world… relationships make a difference

Posted on July 10, 2010 by Nate

Folks, changing the world is not as difficult as you might think. The following concept may be common-sense to some of you and it may be non-sense to others.

Think of the relationships we are all connected to. One person has multiple connections, spanning from casual to very intentional. Every person that one individual is connected to has their own set of relationships. Wouldn’t it make sense that if something happens, good or bad, in any one relationship, that it ripples out to the others?

So if we gather in community in ways that are very intentional, pure, loving, giving, challenging and we are deeply effected by these gatherings, by this community, the relationships that we engage with outside of these gatherings will in turn be effected, and their relationships will in turn be effected, and so on and so on.

I tapped into this a long time ago when I realized that every interaction we have we effect others for good or for ill. If our ripples outward are negative, well, the damage is being done. Very unfortunate that many do not see this!! But if we are making significantly positive and authentic and loving impacts in people’s lives, the ripples go out farther than we may ever know.

So, this is important right? We MUST know that the difference starts with us, with our paying ATTENTION to the spirit of love moving in and around us. We must make every effort to hold space for that beauty and authenticity to unfold.

And we must take NOTHING lightly… nothing… no interaction, gathering, relationship is insignificant in the grand scheme of things. As I like to say, what we are doing here… can change the world.

What ripples are you witnessing… or not witnessing?

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The sacredness in the ordinary

Posted on July 8, 2010 by Nate

What do I really know about community, anyway? I guess if there is one thing I aim for, it is to awaken people to the power of absolutely ordinary experiences… shared as community. It’s not about me… it’s about all of us and what we share together.

I remember a post I put up after hearing a talk by Ken Loyd, from Portland.

I went up to talk to Ken, one of the pastors at the Bridge. He has built some wonderful relationships with those in Portland who “don’t live in houses.” I wanted to talk to him about the beginning processes of starting a vibrant community. I usually end up expressing to folks that the thing that gets me most is the “slowness.” “Slowness! That’s the point!!” Ken said. “You will be an instant success in maybe four or five years… You have to do things that are completely un-extraordinary. Don’t do anything special or spectacular. This is how you will be legendary.” He went on to say that so many churches out there are trying to do extraordinary things. It is getting tiring for people. We just have to be normal and engage people where they are at with the absolutely normal things of life.

This really woke me up.

We get very caught up with the “high” experiences, whether we are religious or not. Burning Man, festivals, ceremonies, church services, the weekend parties, holidays… the list goes on. When we are always “looking forward to…,” we forget to look at what’s happening right now. When we are always “planning for…,” we forget to see what’s going on around us. I’m not saying that we should avoid the former, but the former should not over-balance the later.

Much of my efforts in connecting the community are about holding space for the normal. The community meals, the dialogs in circle, tool libraries, community gardens, and coffee dates. When these become special and enough, we begin to see the Divine working all around us. We don’t need anything more than what we have. We are able to LIVE into the world we want to see transformed into.

What are your sacred ordinaries?

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