We are constantly reminded that change requires a safe and trusting environment. Personally, I am in favor of hugs! However I understand not everyone is and I admire your intent to share the same warmth and positive regard without the physical contact.

I also like the image you speak of when you talk about creating space. I have been fascinated lately with the idea of creating space not for my own efforts but so that Grace can enter in. My own efforts are often small and inadequate so I better hope/trust/have faith that God will work in my relationships and I need to leave room for that to happen!

Sometimes I think that it is more about accompaniment than fixing or “helping.” I believe healing does not come of me or any counselor’s best efforts but of the Holy Spirit. The question then is how can I invite that and be accessible to that transformation. Part of that is knowing that it will go both ways, in any relationship I and the other will be changed.

Sometimes all I can do is stay present to the process, refuse to withdraw and trust that it will be OK, that God will work through and in us.